German bureaucracy

Have I mentioned how challenging it is to get things done?

Today was a prime example. Tuesdays are always difficult- I have an early morning meeting (as in, half an hour earlier than I get to school) which means I have to get Fiona up, dressed, fed, and dragged down the sixty-seven stairs and a full 30 minutes earlier than normal, and that's enough to make me want to crawl back into bed. Then, I have a full day of school with only one special (teacher-talk for forty minutes "off" to run copies, correct, plan, and call parents- in German) and every other week, that special is taken up by a meeting. So. Tuesdays are pretty chaotic to begin with. Now, let's add the fact that it's the ONLY day the parking sticker office is open after 15.00 (seriously. I got a list of their opening times today and it shows that they're open THREE days a week, and two of them, they close before school closes. I'd really love to work there) and I have to collect Fiona from kindergarten and drag her into the silent, white, glass filled (child-friendly? ha!) office to wait, wait, and wait again to get the parking sticker so I can avoid another run-in with the traffic warden.

Today I steeled myself for the torture, despite the fact that in my classroom we made butter today (not my idea of a great project, but the other class did it, so while dragging Fiona down the stairs this morning I was also lugging a giant bag with bread, whisks, an electric beater, and cream) and I was covered with the remnants of that. Off Fiona and I went with the  paperwork that our secretary told us we'd need. And we waited. 

I've been to this office so many times and I've NEVER walked out with what I wanted. I never have the right paperwork with me, or the offices are closed (they also close at random, in addition to their sporadic opening hours), or they're not issuing permits that day. I have a residence permit that expires in June (even though we should have one good for five years), a Massachusetts drivers' license (even though I need a German one, but it requires a translation, and 85 Euros, and I'm sure a blood sample or DNA test) and no parking sticker. Seriously. This is the sort of thing I could do when I was a grownup in Massachusetts in about an hour- whip myself through City Hall, complete the paperwork, yuck it up with the ladies in the office, and be done. This is not possible here. Is it my German? My foreigner status? The fact that I'm totally unsure what I'm supposed to bring and they are helpfully unclear about what I need?

Today was no difference. Believe it or not, I had the right paper (but it was dated in August, and I need one from the past three months), and I also needed my passport (which I had) AND Russ's passport. Which I did not think to bring. Who brings their husband's passport everywhere? So I established, in bad German, that I can get a re-issue of that form with a more current date, but that office is open late (late means after 3 pm) on Thursdays, and this office is open until the late hour of 17.00 (5 pm) on TUESDAYS, effectively eliminating the opportunity for me to go back and re-do these tasks in one fell swoop. I now must return there with several new papers, two passports, and a cranky toddler, on not one but TWO SEPARATE days. 

This is all so I can get a 35 Euro parking sticker, valid from date of issue (whenever that is) until June 24, when I return to the USA and park my car at school for the summer. Is it worth it? Should I just get a few more parking tickets on my street? 

And, dear readers, in addition to a normal kitchen and high ceilings, my new apartment comes with a driveway parking spot.